This post takes a risk. It is "R" rated (not for the immature). But it covers a topic that's very real and very difficult for many many men.
A man I know confided in me this very personal story. For obvious reasons, I will not give any clues about his identity. I'll pretend his name is John Doe.
This was at a point when John had not had sex for many years. He was dreaming an especially sexual dream one night, and getting very worked up. He said to himself, "If I could get a hooker tonight, I think I would do that, despite knowing that it's a huge sin". Then a few moments later, he appealed to God by thinking, "Lord, this is just NOT FAIR!"
John tells me that he heard a voice in the back of his head, not through his ears. But it was definitely a voice, using words, not thoughts. He cannot fully explain the timbre or tone of the voice, but after it spoke, he was absolutely convinced that it was not a thought from his own mind, but that it was God.
The voice said, "Trust in Me and you will see my power".
John tells me that he has not told anybody else this story because of the general perception that if you say you heard a voice or heard God that people, even Christian people, will think of you as Schizophrenic. But he says that there is nothing anybody can say that will convince him he did not hear God.
He says that the voice had several characteristics:
1. It was loving and authoritative. But not demandingly authoritative.
2. It was definitely a different being than himself. He did not initiate the thought. It occurred. The speaker identified himself as being unique by saying "Me" and "my". Joe has never had a thought like that.
I want to add that I noticed that the message was not a condemning message. It was an encouraging message. It did not say that sexual sin was acceptable. It said "Trust in me", implying "Trust in my commandments, and you will see that what you give up in my name will be replaced with something much greater if you persist."
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